bloodI went to Barakhamba Road yesterday. I was standing at the exact place where the bomb blast happened last year. I moved my right ankle in a semi circle to displace the dirt on the road. Maybe I was trying to see if it was still red? I went there to meet my very old friends whom I was meeting after a gap of 7 years.  While standing there I realized how fragile my own life was. I have a lovely family, adorable friends, a good job and some dreams, but someone can press a button and everything will vanish in a second. I just have to be in the wrong place at the wrong time. Moving around in Connaught Place yesterday gave me this creepy feeling. I loved that place! I have some beautiful memories of C.P. but now there is always this fear that its not a safe place. The old warm feeling has died. Its gone.

Whom should I blame? Whom should I blame for embedding this fear in my heart? The fear that I might have to see a mingled, limbless, burnt body of a family member one day? The fear that I, who just want to lead his normal life and live happily ever after with his family and friends, might be blown apart the very next second?

Should I blame the Indian Government? Indians have a “Get used to it” attitude towards everything. Someone is littering on the road. Get used to it! Spitting? Get used to it! Corrupt policemen? Get used to it! BOMB BLASTS? Get used to it! Ofcourse, the Government officials also suffer from the same disease. It took thousands of people flocking the roads of Mumbai and carrying derogatory posters to wake up the government and to make them realise that there is a difference between butchering humans and butchering goats, to make them realise that they were chosen to protect us, to make them realise that “Get used to it” is not going to work this time. We, the citizens of India, choose politicians and give them bullet proof vehicles and 50 black cat commandos each from our hard earned money, not because they can feel safe and forget about the common man who is as vulnerable as he always was. Thinking and mulling over something is good but there comes a point when action is required. How long did the Pakistan Government took to sack its National Security adviser after he confirmed that the lone surviving terrorist is Pakistani? And how long did the Indian Government took to decide “something” about what Mr. A.R. Antulay said? The difference is stark and naked, and THAT is the problem with us. Having a pessimistic and defensive approach does not work when your neighbouring countries are a breeding ground for terrorists. War can never be an option, but can the  government at least come strong on our own security agencies and the police force? 

Or should I blame the Pakistani PM? He is trying every trick to make the world believe that its an internal problem of India. Infact, after his latest statement today, which says that – Why is the world more concerned about the Mumbai attacks than the killings in Palestine? ‘‘We have to see that the world does not have double standards. See how many innocent women and children have been killed in Palestine. Why is nobody talking about that? Why is the world silent on that?’’, I have decided not to follow the buffoonery anymore. Its tormenting. I think its high time that the Pakistani PM stops using the forced and mindboggling euphemisms and tell India to go to hell. That would be at least honest, if nothing else! Whether it may be Mumbai or Palestine, you would be glad to know Mr. PM, that it is me, the common man, who is dying.

I don’t care about the political mud slinging matches which Indian and Pakistani politicians are indulging in right now. I don’t care about and I am not a part of the various religious groups which are fighting their mindless and stoical wars by killing innocent people like me all over the world.

I just want to live happily. I want to love the city I live in. I wan’t to roam fearlessly in C.P. I want to believe that I will live to see my dreams fulfilled and will not be shot through my head while celebrating a friend’s birthday in a hotel or when I am at a railway station to receive a family member. Am I asking for too much? Is it too hard to achieve this? Is it too hard to stop fighting over pieces of lands, stop turning terrorism into a profession, stop waging wars in the name of religion?

Or is everything too complicated now to move it backwards? 

About the Author:

Amit Sharma is the Author of fiction novel False Ceilings published by Lifi Publications in January 2016.
Amit always keeps a book and a portable reading light in his bag (much to the amusement of his fellow travellers). His other hobbies include watching world cinema, travelling, staring at hills, digging into various cuisines, cooking, listening to music, painting, blogging, making his daughter laugh and helping his wife with her unnecessary and prolonged shopping.
He is currently working on his Second novel which is a thriller.

34 Comments

  1. Bjorn Tabanera January 11, 2009 at 8:17 pm - Reply

    deep. very deep. visit my blog

    thesavedartist.wordpress.com

  2. Reema January 11, 2009 at 8:40 pm - Reply

    I tell you what we need now is God/Mother Nature to press the reset button.

  3. harsh January 11, 2009 at 9:03 pm - Reply

    the same place in CP where we used to spend a lot of time went into dust in a few seconds …. we were lucky …. some others were not !!! …. just pray that no such incident takes place again ….. life is so unpredictable ….. you can never bet with what can happen next …..

  4. Vijaya Bharat January 11, 2009 at 9:10 pm - Reply

    I perfectly agree with Reema’s comment. Now everything is politicised. Nobody cares about the common man. Everthing is related with ‘MONEY’. Still you are in hopes but as I used to comment every time, my hopes died long back itself. I dont expect anything from Indian politicians. At last I want to tell one thing about time taken for sacking Durrani & Antulay. Durrani is a Muslim who is in a Muslim nation. Nobody cares what ever happens to him. But Antulay is a Muslim who belongs to a minority group in India which respects human rights than to human lives. There are tens of thousands of people who will back him for their own benefits. I dont want to comment about the bloody backing by political parties any way. I AM SICK OF THIS !!!

  5. arvind January 11, 2009 at 10:39 pm - Reply

    interesting comment by REema
    Although i dont knw what to say .,,
    Life is just so unfair ..
    anything can happen anytime ..
    WE as a human race in general are to be blamed …

  6. Trailblazer January 11, 2009 at 11:37 pm - Reply

    I agree. There can be peace. And there should be peace. But it isn’t completely our fault, you know.

  7. Destination Infinity January 12, 2009 at 12:24 am - Reply

    Interesting point you made about ‘terrorism’ being made a profession. Now, who funds such activities? Is it the neighboring state alone or are there more people (private, govt, etc) involved in the funding of such camps?. Why would someone fund an activity that is not going to give them economic benefits? Why can’t the Govt. attempt to stop such funding and hit at the roots, instead of asking for some 10 or 15 people to be handed over?

    Destination Infinity

  8. Shefaly January 12, 2009 at 2:57 am - Reply

    Amit

    Funny Reema invokes God when all of the world’s problems can be traced to people who believe in the concept!

    If it makes you happy, it is the same all the world over, not just in Delhi or Bombay. But we don’t hide in our houses. The day after the bombs in the underground in London, people were back using it. Although the top deck of a bus was blown too, I still sit at the top deck on the rare occasions that I take a bus. When we die, we do not see it coming – whether a bomb, a heart attack, an accident or passing away in sleep. Fear is our own choice; as it fearlessness.

    As for DestinationInfinity’s question as to who funds it, well here are some thoughts:

    1. Law-abiding people who believe in the ’cause’ do; the Khalistan movement was financed by people in Canada and UK, who thought it was a grand idea.
    2. Activities that seem harmless also generate profits that fund terrorism. Next time, if you are tempted to buy pirated DVDs, ask where the profits go! We know for instance where profits of pirated DVDs in the UK go – some go to kill Indian soldiers in so called Azad Kashmir through migrants and sympathisers from that area.
    3. Illegal trade in drugs and arms; do you know the Taleban who were fiercely against opium growing are now actively encouraging it? For two fold benefit – money and stupefying westerners with drugs!

    It is our life. We make choices every day that shape it whether with our ‘chalta hai’ or ‘get used to it’ or by speaking up and being law-abiding ourselves. There is a price to pay in terms of time or money. Reducing the argument down to the basics – WE are responsible for what happens in our world.

    Sounds harsh? Too bad.

  9. Liju Philip January 12, 2009 at 8:24 am - Reply

    Fully agree with Shefaly’s post above. There’s nothing much we can do about it. Our destiny is defined. When death has to come, it will. Maybe in sleep, in a bus crash, or in a terrorist’s bullet or bomb.

    Keep walking and do your thing. Hope that our security forces do their job and nab the perpetrators before they set off the next mayhem.

  10. Chirag January 12, 2009 at 11:26 am - Reply

    The problem with us and we have “Got used to it” , unfortunately. You can never win a world with outsider till you are one on the inside.

  11. Shefaly January 12, 2009 at 2:13 pm - Reply

    Liju Philip:

    I argue two separate things – one that we must accept the inevitability of death, and two despite that we must live life to higher standards than we seem to be doing. In that respect, destiny is different from the ‘inevitability of death’ and life is definitely about ‘self determinism’ rather than destiny.

    So I hope for my argument’s sake that either you misread it or you disagree with it 🙂

  12. Oxy January 12, 2009 at 4:23 pm - Reply

    Yes we all can live, provided we allow ourselves to. It’s ‘us’ the human race that is responsible for this and it’s ‘us’ that have to pay for it..

  13. kanagu January 12, 2009 at 5:44 pm - Reply

    See even in India, it took the attack on Mumbai on large scale helped to awake our politicians.. they are expecting something big to happen to do something about that. When a common man died, they didn’t cared. When a millionarie in Taj hotel was dying they are taking the measures. The double standarsd are all over our country :(then there was a fight was happened between Indian Army and terrorists which went unnoticed. Even we people didn’t take a note of that. It will go on like this until some drastic change in our system.

  14. Smita January 12, 2009 at 8:01 pm - Reply

    You know the only thing out of that buffon’s statement which made sense to me was the fact where he said that India’s intelligence had failed. Rest all is utter crap!!!!

    And yes asking for security is our right!!!!

    If only we could turn the clock back

  15. Reema January 12, 2009 at 8:20 pm - Reply

    @Shefaly problem is with the people who believe in the concept, no? Not with the concept itself!! Moreover not every believer is the cause of problem. The real problem is the people who think they believe in the concept but actually they have no idea what the concept is all about or the “ways” of believing in concept have been misconstrued/ misinterpreted by them.

  16. Amit January 12, 2009 at 10:00 pm - Reply

    @Bjorn Tabanera : Welcome and thanks for visiting!

    @Reema : Thank God our laptops are not as complicated as our nature. 🙂

    @Harsh : Praying is not going to work. Actually, I am not sure what might work.

    @Vijaya Bharat : Antulay got quite a lot of backlash because of his statements. The government should have passed a stern statement from their side.

    @Arvind : I don’t think you can equally blame everyone.

    @Trailblazer : Our fault? Do you mean Indians?

    @Destination Infinity : I think Shefaly gave quite an apt answer. I think it has gone beyond a mere fight for a piece of land. Its a profit making business now.

  17. Amit January 12, 2009 at 10:03 pm - Reply

    @Shefaly : Its all about taking the concept with a pinch of salt. 🙂 99% of the world’s population fail to do so and yes, that is the root of all problems.
    Well, no, it does not make me feel any better. Its not as if I am living in a constant fear but these thoughts are always at the back of my mind. I was shocked when I came to know about the pirated DVDs story. We have been indirectly funding them??
    Yes, we do make choices in our life. But, I might be making 10% choices which may be having a negative impact on others while someone else might be making 80% such choices. And at the end of the day, isn’t it the guy who made those 10% choices, is the one who is at the recieving end?

    @Liju : Its not destiny. Its the level to which we have complicated things because of our inflated egos.

    @Chirag : No country can be one from inside. You can always find people to bend and bribe.

    @Oxy : I think its more of “one” of us being more responsible and the “other” one of us who pays. Responsibility and repercussions are not equally balanced.

    @Kanagu : Its not only in India. Humans have a tendency to procrastinate till something big happens. Even U.S. woke up after 9/11.

    @Smita : I have crossed the phase when I used to laugh at the statements. There is no point in reacting to them. He is pointing at the Sun and asking us to believe that its the moon.

  18. dinu January 12, 2009 at 10:41 pm - Reply

    well said .. well expressed …. touching 🙂
    Pakistan is totally screwed up man … so is their government and their PM …. don’t expect anything from them …

    ps: can you update the link to my blog ? 😀 and put name as dinu please 😀

  19. vimal January 13, 2009 at 4:06 am - Reply

    I have spoken enough on this, you know right !
    Its us who have to change, its upto us to bring in the change and its again us who have stand up for the change !

  20. Poonam Sharma January 13, 2009 at 1:53 pm - Reply

    Chnage, Change, Change everyone says. Well, I agree. Chnage yourself. But I have an extension, only me and you changing doesnt help either and we get stuck soemtimes. So we MUST also inspire, insist, others to change perhaps by your example.

    And @Reema: Please dont ask God to press RESET button, selfish it may sound, I want to live, there are wonderful things here for my right in this birth. 😛

  21. Nita January 14, 2009 at 1:53 pm - Reply

    Amit, I read this post earlier and I was moved. I was so moved that I didn’t know what to comment. It’s such a beautiful post! Now I read it again. And I agree with all your points. What I find most ridiculous are arguments that don’t make a fuss about molestation, not when rape is going on! Or don’t touch the thief, go after the bank robber. Or don’t bother about the assault, not when there is a murder! Or don’t touch the killers and murders, when there are more henious murders going on! Or don’t punish my dog shitting on the pavement, go and catch others who are shitting!
    These arguments are always made by selfish and often the guilty people and people who have no concept of what justice is.
    That Tavleen Singh incident comes to my mind. She refused to pay the fine for her dog shitting on Marine Drive because slum dwellers shit on roads! Go and catch them she said!! She was guilty, and she was being egoistic.

  22. Arpit January 14, 2009 at 5:27 pm - Reply

    amit, one of the blasts took place next to the building in which withering willow worked. but thankfully she had an off that day
    i know , its just so insecure out there……..think hoax bomb calls are made even in schools…..recently we too got circulars conveying that nothing will be passed on by school to the children ( like if they forget their lunch box etc …even the parents wouldnt be allowed to handover it to the child )
    i dont know what pakistan has been upto………..one day they accept the charges next day they deny it
    but i think they will realize the importance of this issue when such thing happens with them……and then eventually nobody would listen to them!

  23. Amit January 14, 2009 at 11:10 pm - Reply

    @Dinu : Thanks. 🙂 And I have updated the link and name. 🙂

    @Vimal : We have changed but that is not enough I guess…

    @Poonam : Yes, I agree with you. 🙂 And yes, even I won’t like God to press that button. 🙂

    @Nita : Thanks. 🙂 Yes, we have a tendency of overshadowing the “less” important issues because of the bigger ones. We forget that the smaller issues are just a prelude to the big issues.
    So, according to Talveen Singh, if someone is caught molesting a girl, he can refuse to feel guilty because there are rapists who are roaming free? Some people are so mindless and that is why the world is in such a mess.

    @Arpit : I really don’t understand the Pakistani govt. They change statements every second day and I hate people who speak and then think. If you are fooling someone then do it perfectly without leaving any traces.

  24. Prax January 15, 2009 at 4:17 am - Reply

    Amit
    i really didnt think that u of all people thought that pak was a democray, to dogedly persue the PM

    if im not mistaken it is a fiefdom run by ceo gen kayani and in parts my the islamists and rich tribal families ..

    just like MAdam Sonya is running our country

  25. Prax January 15, 2009 at 4:20 am - Reply

    typos democracy and by the islamists

  26. A January 15, 2009 at 4:03 pm - Reply

    Pakistan PM prefers to deride himself and his fellow-men with statements like these, and I hope at least the international world diplomats could sense his shallow outlook on things that matters most for his country.

    I just wonder sometimes that is all this anguish going to take us anywhere…It does help recreate the awareness in some sense, but is that all.

  27. Deeps January 16, 2009 at 8:20 pm - Reply

    This is a beautiful post Amit…it speaks a lot.

  28. amreekandesi January 17, 2009 at 8:41 am - Reply

    The world probably has become too complicated for there to be a simple solution to all these problems.

    Everybody has reasons for speaking up or staying silent on issues – all said and done, everybody first and foremost watches out for themselves.

    We can just hope that the number of people who think like you grows in number. Exponentially, desirably.

  29. amreekandesi January 17, 2009 at 8:42 am - Reply

    Love the new look of your blog..much crispier looking!

  30. Amit January 18, 2009 at 10:46 pm - Reply

    @Prax : Yes, but I always thought that they will bend under world pressure. Somehow, even that is not working.

    @A: Yes, he is shallow. Everyone is laughing at him. Does he really believe that the world is going to believe even 1% of whatever he says?

    @Deeps : Thanks. 🙂

    @Amreekandesi : Yes, its too complicated now I guess. The only way out is to have zero expectations from others and make our own country safer.
    Yes, I hope so too. 🙂
    And thanks!!! Someone noticed at last! 🙂

  31. Final_Transit January 23, 2009 at 9:17 am - Reply

    Amit, I was in India until first week of January and all our news was full of you know what. But now I am in Toronto and I have to read Canadian and US newspapers rabidly to find news tucked away in a corner about this ‘world pressure’ on Pakistan. Loved your post but it is natural for Paki government to be defensive about their country. It’s not what they say that matters, it’s what we do (rather what we should have done.)

  32. Amit January 23, 2009 at 10:58 pm - Reply

    @Priyank : The problem is that no kind of pressure is working. Yes, I agree that we have to strengthen our own security. We also need to cut all ties with Pakistan although I wonder if that will ever happen.

  33. Preeti January 25, 2009 at 6:57 pm - Reply

    Nice post, Amit; agree with all the points made.

    But its also too depressing coz like many other posts tagged under ‘frustrations’, it too ends with nearly same set of unanswered questions; with almost little or no hope of ever receiving an answer to them.

    @Shefaly, Amit
    The point made on the issue of buying pirated DVDs is quite interesting but I didn’t get it properly. I mean, piracy is definitely condemnable but u think (in India) the money goes into promoting terrorism??
    Is it a mere speculation or is there any proof supporting this point? Because IF THERE IS, why is it not used to demote piracy?

  34. Amit January 29, 2009 at 9:48 pm - Reply

    @Preeti : Thanks! I am not sure if there are any answers to all these questions.
    Regarding the pirated DVDs part, the money generated is all black. Even when we download songs, the profit made by the website is all illegal. Imagine how the money can be used.
    It is not stopped because the people who could have stopped it get a part of the money.

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